🌿 Reflections on Death, Life, and the Illusion of Self | Plum Village

 

So, here is death. There is a deep perception that this is me; this body, this mind, this identity, and that this me is going to live for some time. But death goes together with our birth. Because we believe we start here, as me, and live for a time before dying, we begin to fear what happens after. We wonder, “What will become of me?” We may think, “I need to continue; I don’t want to end.” And that is where the struggle begins.

During the time between birth and death, we are caught in survival, constantly clinging to the perception of a separate me. This separation leads to struggle. We think of ourselves as individuals, “me here, separate from the world,” and when death comes, we resist. But what is death, truly?

Death is a natural process that goes hand in hand with life and birth. Imagine death as our out-breath. After exhaling, what happens? Naturally, a fresh in-breath comes. We don’t hold our breath in fear; we breathe out, and we breathe in. In the same way, life and death support each other, so natural, so necessary. Yet, we cling to life and reject death. That clinging, that perception of me, is the true source of suffering.

Death itself is not the source of suffering; our perception is. The notion of me comes from our thinking, from human thought. So the practice is to take care of this notion of a separate me. That is the way out. We must learn to see that this me is made of non-me elements. When we realize this, we are free from the notion of self.

It is simple, complete, and doable. Breathing in, we recognize: this me is made of oxygen, of trees, of the ocean, of life. With mindfulness and concentration, this insight frees us. We see that we don’t need the idea of a separate me to breathe. In fact, letting go of that notion allows us to be truly alive, to be the real me. We can then say, “I have arrived. I am home, in the here and now.”

Once we have that inner understanding of being, we become peaceful, happy, and compassionate toward the suffering caused by the illusion of separateness. We don’t ignore the suffering of death. “No birth, no death” does not mean denial; it is the insight into the reality of non-separation. Only through this understanding can we find true peace, happiness, and compassion to embrace the deep suffering that comes with death.

The suffering of death happens every moment: a snake eats a frog, humans eat animals, even when we eat a salad, life transforms into life. Through the insight of interbeing, of “no death,” we can embrace both birth and death. This is the real teaching of the Buddha, based on the Udana Sutra: no birth, no death, no being, no non-being. This is our true home, a refuge embracing both birth and death, being and non-being.

From this understanding, we can heal the deep suffering of existence and transform it into compassion and togetherness rather than separation. We learn to honor life with greater reverence, and to honor death as well. We stop running away from death or fearing it; instead, we embrace it with peace and compassion, turning it into a source of aliveness.

No mud, no lotus. Like Brother Thay said, by embracing the suffering of death, we generate more compassion, more peace, and a deeper commitment to live this life fully for those who have died. Because we are not separate, we live in honor of their lives and their deaths.

Life becomes so precious when we see that the suffering of death is crucial for our growth and awakening to the nature of no birth and no death. Birth and death hold hands; no birth and no death hold hands with them; the lotus and mud embrace each other.

This is the teaching of the Udana Sutra, offered by the Buddha. May we all make use of this teaching to embrace our lives deeply for ourselves, and for those who have passed.

(Excerpt inspired by Plum Village teachings)

This passage is transcribed from a talk in the video “What is the Deep Meaning of Peace and Love Without Attachment? | Q&A Session for Children and Adults,” shared by a monastic of Zen Master Thích Nhất Hạnh’s Plum Village community.

In this section, a Plum Village monk reflects on the nature of death, interbeing, and the illusion of a separate self. The words remind us that death is not the enemy of life but part of its continuous rhythm — like the out-breath that allows the next in-breath to arise.

Shared here with deep respect and gratitude to Thích Nhất Hạnh and the Plum Village Sangha for their ongoing guidance and teachings.
© Plum Village Community of Engaged Buddhism.